Entry log #2: Out of place

Whenever I head to a new place or meet new people, my body sets itself to behave differently. The environment and the familiarity of the people are the triggers that cause my behavior. And the behavior isn’t bad, in my opinion. I just catch myself doing it at the moment.

This is how I act:

Number one, I become the nice guy. Of course this is how everyone should be when they’re coming into a new environment. And that’s because we don’t want to disrespect anyone and give the wrong impression. You never know if they could be a connection who could be useful in the future. For me, it comes with being raised in a Christian, Hispanic family. Respect everyone, especially elders. However, there’s a limit on how much I interact. I only give the “hello, God bless you brother/sister,” “thank you,” “you’re welcome,” and “God bless, goodbye.” I usually just let people come to me if they want an interaction, which supports my second characteristic of my fixed-behavior.

Number two, I’m hella awkward and timid. And I mean very, very, very awkward and timid. And to avoid that, I minimize my interaction with people unless they come to me. And if you’re a friend, no matter at which level of friendship, I’m going to be myself to you. So far, only a hand full of individuals have been able to accept my weirdness haha.

Number three, isolate myself. Even though I admit that I’m a loner, I’m not a complete loner that isolate from the world. It’s part of minimizing my interaction. The way I see it, if someone has the gut to talk to me, then I’ll be real with them. And I hope that we establish some kind of relationship because I like people, most of the time. If no one approaches, then either I try to interact just one person that looks promising or I just stay by myself.

I don’t know if everyone goes through those… but it’s how I do it.

Honestly, I much prefer the relationships I have now. Most of them are weird themselves and we get along with each other.

If we think about it, we are weird ourselves in our own way. So embrace it, and you may see who are your friends.

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